Stop Waiting For Summer To Feel Better

I'll kick off the season by challenging the belief that summer break is the only way to recover from teacher burnout, and I'll explain why “I’ll feel better when…” keeps your nervous system stuck in stress, and I'll share a simple micro shift to help us practice real restoration so you can feel better all year, not just when school is out. 

In this episode, we'll:

• why counting down to summer actually blocks your ability to be present
• how the nervous system learns that busyness feels normal and “safe” 
• three awareness questions that reveal where we live on autopilot 

And, if you haven't pre-ordered your book yet, make sure you do at empowerededucator.com/book. 

Let’s keep the conversation going! Find me at: empowerededucator.com

Get the book at: empowerededucator.com/book

Instagram: @jenrafferty_

Facebook: Empowered Educator Faculty Room

Transcript

Season Return And Book Launch

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome to the first full episode of season five of this podcast. I am so glad to be back here, especially because we are celebrating the launch of my book, The Empowered Educator: 10 Lessons to Prevent Burnout, Reclaim Your Joy, and Unlock Your Teaching Potential will be available on August 4th, 2026, through Penguin Random House. And I could not be more excited to share this out with the world. So this season, and particularly this inaugural episode, is very special to me. And I'm so glad that we get to kick this off this summer, a few weeks before the official launch. So we'll be celebrating the book the whole month of August and beyond. So if you haven't pre-ordered your book yet, make sure you do that at empowerededucator.com/slash book. So even though it's the middle of July, you don't have to look very far to find back to school supplies already. And I literally just saw yesterday a spirit of Halloween pop up in one of those empty stores by me. And so it's easy to feel like summer is already slipping away while at the same time it hasn't even really started yet. And so we get into this unhealthy cycle of counting down the days until it's summer, but then not really able to enjoy it because we feel like it's almost over before it even begins, let alone feel like we have enough time to feel good about going back to school next year.

The Trap Of Feeling Better Later

SPEAKER_00 1:26

So today I'm going to be talking to you about two big things. First one, this idea of I'll feel better when summer starts is not really a great solution for burnout prevention and what hitting reset actually means so you can feel good all year round and not just during the summer. And then we'll end today with a micro shift that you can do immediately to start to change the way you move through the summer. So let's dive in. So many of us go through the school year, counting down the days until Friday, the weeks until vacation, the months until summer break, and even the years until retirement. And one of the common themes of all of this is well, I'll feel better when. And the reason why it's not a great solution is because we're not actually able to be present in the moment if we're thinking about a better scenario in the future. It tells your nervous system things are not great right now, but maybe they'll be better in the future. But then what happens is the weekend comes or the vacation comes or summer comes. And because you've told your nervous system over and over and over again that the present moment isn't really a great place to be, your brain is going to consistently think ahead and future to another possible scenario that might be better one day. So you're never actually able to be content and satisfied and happy in the moment. So those feelings compounded lead to this low-hum sense of stress all the time. Because you've told your system over and over and over again that right now doesn't feel good, that sometime in the future will. But of course, we never get to sometime in the future because we only exist now. And this is why every year feels the same. Just like how we make New Year's resolutions and promises to ourselves. If we don't have the infrastructure and the scaffolding of support to help us sustain these goals and these intentions, we're not actually going to keep them. So we need to start asking better questions because rushing around and being busy and being in the hustle like we feel like we are all year is actually not proof that you are working hard. It is not proof of your productivity, and it is certainly not proof of your value

Why Stillness Feels Unsafe

SPEAKER_00 4:07

and worth. It's proof of feeling restless, and it's proof of feeling agitated. So, how do we avoid losing ourselves in the midst of all of this busyness that we feel throughout the year? Because creating safety in the space, in the quiet, in the calm is what your nervous system actually needs to feel good in the present moment. Right now, your nervous system probably does not feel safe in stillness because it's so used to the busyness. And even though the busyness and the hustle doesn't feel good, it's what feels normal to your nervous system. So it's what feels safe to your nervous system, which is why during summer there's this feeling of either I don't know what to do with myself, and it takes about five weeks for you to feel calm, or you're consistently flooded with thoughts of worry and anxiety and busyness because that's how your brain knows that you can function. So hanging out with your family on a Sunday isn't going to fly with your nervous system because it doesn't have any evidence of you doing that and surviving to tell the tale. Remember, if you've been hanging out with Empowered Educator and with me for a while, you know that your brain, your nervous system, has one job, and that's to keep you alive. It doesn't care if you're happy, your brain doesn't care if you're calm, your brain doesn't care if you are living your dreams. In fact, it would rather you didn't live your dreams because it has no evidence of you doing that and surviving. So again, even though you're in a situation right now like summer where you might have an option and an opportunity to feel relaxed and calm and unhurried, your nervous system doesn't feel safe doing that because it doesn't have evidence of you doing that and surviving to tell the tale. So instead of having the questions that you ask yourself, is like, what's wrong with me? Or saying things over and over again, like, well, I'll feel better when. So here's question

Three Questions To Break Autopilot

SPEAKER_00 6:26

number one. Where in your week are you moving fast simply because everyone around you is also moving fast? This is a really important question to ask for awareness. Anytime we ask questions like this, remember we are only looking for data. This is information. This isn't about judgment or being hard on yourself, or like, why am I doing this? This is truly just about gathering information because you can't change something you don't notice. And so often the things that we do throughout our lives are well beyond our cognitive awareness, which we'll be talking about on another podcast episode. So we need to be more aware of what we're doing through this lens of objective non-judgment. So now this brings me to the second question I want you to ask yourself. If rushing around isn't proof of your productivity or your worthiness or value, what would that proof actually look like for you? Because here's another truth. You are worthy and valuable just because you woke up this morning. You don't actually have to do anything to prove that. And this is a really interesting question to ask, especially in this hustle culture that we have. I mean, in the past, I've answered the question, how are you doing? with answers like, oh, I'm so busy, as if being busy was a symbol of my productivity, which equaled my worth somehow. And this is a huge revelation once we start unpacking. Well, what if I wasn't rushing around? What if actually rest and recovery was productive? And what if none of that had anything to do with my value or worth as an educator or as a human being or a mom or any of the roles that I play, a partner? What if we redefined what this looks like? So the question again is if rushing around is in proof of your productivity or your worthiness or your value, what would it actually look like? What would that proof look like for you? And the third question is what does your body feel like on a day when you're truly present versus a day when you're simply going through the motions? Now, this is also a really important question because it has to do with the physical felt sense of what you are experiencing throughout your day. So much of the time we are so unaware of what's happening in our bodies. So if you're paying attention, what does it feel like physically when you're being present versus when you're just going through the motions? Remember, this is information gathering. It's like we're being our own Nancy Drew of ourselves, just collecting clues and information so that we can make different choices that actually serve us instead of just following along with our default or autopilot. And why this matters now in the summer is because your body, your nervous system, is still responding for many of you to an environment that no longer exists. So even though you're in the middle of summer, your mind and your nervous system still might think that you're in school. So that overload of exhaustion and that mental collapse that you feel at the end of the day, it's completely normal because the wake of the school year is still very much felt in your body. So hitting the reset button isn't just about time spent not at school. It's about who you're being when you're not at school and when you go back to school because practice makes permanent. You become what you practice. And if we're practicing hustle, if we're practicing busyness all of the time, or just even just for those 10 months out of the year, that is enough to teach your nervous system that that's what normal feels like and that's who you become. So we're playing around with asking these questions so we can make different choices to become someone who actually gets to rest and recover over the summer. And these habits will continue to play out during the school year. You become what you practice.

Micro Shift Body Check-In

SPEAKER_00 11:01

So the micro shift for this week is to pay attention to your body. That third question: what does your body feel like? Because those physical sensations are the only way for your body to communicate with you. So pay attention. It could be right after you end this podcast, just take a little notice. Where am I feeling tension in my body? Am I feeling tired? Am I feeling energized? Am I feeling overwhelmed? Just notice. Or perhaps you take time before you go to bed, or perhaps you take time as soon as you wake up in the morning. But create a moment for this micro shift. Prioritize yourself, even if it feels uncomfortable, because this will pave the way to give your nervous system, your mind, your body a gift of actual restoration, which I know that you are craving. And these little micro shifts will start to pave the way for you to become someone who actually feels restored and well rested all of the time and does not have to count down the weeks until summer vacation for you to finally feel

Preorder Reminder And Closing

SPEAKER_00 12:12

good. So, as we close out, as a reminder, if you have not already, grab a pre-order copy of my book, The Empowered Educator. And you can get that right at empowerededucator.com/slash book. It releases August 4th. We're going to be celebrating the whole month and beyond. And of course, if you like today's episode, please leave a review so more teachers can find this podcast and be sure to subscribe so you can continue to stay in the loop. Remember, you are a gift to this world. So act accordingly.